SINCE I began writing short extracts from my diary and making them available to my good fellows in Twitter, it has been brought to my notice that, in isolation, these may prove somewhat difficult to understand, and therefore do little to raise recognition for the sudden incipient nudity syndrome, under which I must labour my time here. So, gentle reader, I have decided to collate here periodically such entries as I find worthwhile or least-personally upsetting to relate. It is not a happy condition; nor one which offers any consolation of a cure, but I take comfort in my home and, lately, of the splendidly-crafted head prophylactics, developed and hand-made for me by the artisans of our National Health Service - as fine and august a body of men and, indeed, women, as it is possible to come across.

Some entries cannot be published here owing to their distressing nature, though are recorded in full in my private journal, which must be destroyed as I draw my final breath. May the great powers that be forgive me for what I am about to relate



17th Aug. '09
Dear Diary. Went Crewe. Did essential. Met lovely assistant. Clothes fell off. Was ravished. Shop in shock. Ran home tired but happy. AGD.

18th Aug. '09
Met Mrs Arbuthnot re ancient grvstns at chrchyd. Will rub fr posterity. Showed splendid occluded exmpl by her lovely DD B. CFO WR VGD
To Library exchange bks. Stock reducing. Discussed with Libry Asst Vicky. Agreed sad times. Fearful. Sympat.hug. Eyes met. CFO WR VGD

19th Aug. '09
Rtrn faulty DVD to BBstrs. Said to v.p. asst 'I need to see how film (Ai no corrida) finishes' She pulled me over counter. CFO WR VGD
With Mrs Finch re S in Bloom. V intrstng chat re Kniphofia uvaria. Mrs F kept winking! Asked my advice. O!Crafty Mrs F! CFO WR(2)

20th Aug. '09
To Dr Bunt. Discssd rcnt SIN occurrences. Agrd new headbag reqd & got prescrptn! Then Dr asked me to remove clothes! Made exc. & left
Hosp vstng. Lonely Polish lady had no visitors. I said 'Dobre południe! Jak są wy?' Nasze oczy spotykają. Moja odzież zmniejszała się WR

21st Aug. '09
Jolly Morris Men in town! Splendid! Met Mrs Ford & v.p. DD J. 'Morris On'! cried I! 'Reminds Me!' said she & left. J. noodled up. CFO WR
In WaitR. Tiny YMummy asked for me to reach BalsVngr. As I leaned her hand grabbed. Seen by Asst: askd YM to leave! Asst v.pretty CFO WR

22nd Aug. '09
At Vill. Fete. Mrs Dalrymple had good bookstall. I complimented her fine showing. She proffered hand. I kissed. Flew through air. CFO WR

23rd Aug. '09
At Service. Lovely sermon. A cat loped in and left bird on altar! I rushed to clear and bumped into comely Ms L. Our eyes met CFO WR VGD

24th Aug. '09
Dy: New headbag! Looser than last but better neck fit! Shld prove imposs. for naughties to insert wasps now. Shll wear tomorrw! O Happy Day!

25th Aug. '09
Wore new headbag to town. V.cmfrtbl I must say! Delightful nods in passing. Then dragonfly in bag! Pulled off: Bad, bad S. behind! CFO WR

26th Aug. '09
Town to buy shoes. V.smart tan pair tho' tight. V.p. Asst T. stretched & refitted then tugged leg sharply. Was Pulled from stool. CFO WR

27th Aug. '09
Town with modfd headbag; a great success! Conversed civilly with 8 ppl! 8! No theft! No insect insertion! No dousing with pitch!! VVVGD!
Headbag missing. Found in town doused with pitch & colonized by wasps. Bent to shoo when noticed Miss ML all too late. Gambol'd. CFO WR

27th Aug. '09
Woe. Sat alone in chrchyd hitting face wth rock. Kind lady stayed hand. "I have something to put on that for you" Fell backwards. CFO WR

4th Sep. '09
Freedom! Released from one week's custody in town gaol! Mrs Biggar-Pilloes kindly met me with her DD S. Stood no earthly chance. CFO WR

When first discovered in manuscript form in Dundee in 1926, authorities pounced upon the following as a mature work of Arthur Scobie (1849-1922), a former English teacher from Penicuik, who had left a note that this work, held to be his masterpiece, should be presented to the nation and not merely left for the manuscript collectors to hide away. This remained the situation until 2008, when a student at St Catherine's, Oxford, remarked that it really resembled the style of William McGonagall. Fortunately, all the appropriate experts agreed by saying 'Oh yes, it does rather', which, of course, changes the whole attribution thing. The reader is invited to make up their own minds.



( The Rich Cake Disaster )

( RickyBee's FollowFriday Twit List )

 

It is becoming more than a mere worry and coincidence that I appear to be developing a fixation with poet Pam Ayres. She has a smile, you see. And is very much the older woman in this imaginary ménage à deux. I wrote the following to a friend. Or should it be 'channelled?'





( Ooh, I do approve of fish and chips )

According to Superstizioni riguardo a determinate derrate alimentari nel contesto di vita orchestrale, a little-known pamphlet of the eighteenth century, itself a revision of a much earlier work, Superstitions concerning certain foodstuffs in the context of Orchestral Life, had already reached a high degree of prevalence well before the infamous, so-called, 'Pasta Wars' between percussionists and cellists of 1788. The following extract, translated as well as I am able, is directed at string players in general, and to First and Second violins in particular. It concerns the most prized confection of the age: cake.

( For string players only . .  )

Hmm. Since everyone and their dog appear to have taken this thing, I thought . . .









I understand that I must bow, scrape and grovel to all whom bear red lightsabers and/or claim regal nerd statii.

This will have to do for several days' worth - stupid to make separate entries.




( Saturday+ 7 February+ 2009 )</div>

Real problems putting these on MySpace - the fonts seem incompatible.

These here because MySpace character set not compatible with that unicode used by Twitter. So numerous tweets in MySpace app (incidentally, the Twitter-based app, not the MySpace-based one, which still claims 'we have a problem') make no sense when transferred. I can see it will end up as a cut'n'paste job. The HTML and font works just fine with LiveJournal. So (yet) another bunch here for the nones.

In honour of a childhood passion of mine, here is a clip of something I tried never to miss (in its all-too-short run) as a very young sprog. Those of a certain age may recall black-and-white Saturday afternoons meant The Telegoons. Many will be far, far, far, far too young to do so. Those people are not far too young not any . . lon . ger?

Sapristi Knuckoes! I give you (some of) . . The Hastings Flyer !

Am hoping to get MySpace app sorted in order to save these there. Occasional in LiveJournal OK but v. lazy and not really respecting of oneself, let alone others. MySpace app not co-operating at moment.

( Wednesday 4 February 2009 )</div>

Oh you so square, Daddy-o!! Get with the beat man! It's like uncool and so not neat! These seven - they are ancient and, like, no longer relevant in our cool universe, Spoonyverse? Like, where is 'Cussing', man? Like, letting off firework display of invective, Detective! Yeah . . Babyblue - put me downtown for CUSSING, like bussing - you wait for hours then dozens come along at once, Bunce! Fact is, Sis - all the old seven wrinkly dudes -  they apply at anyone with latest iPhone, y'dig? Not I, your sky-pie high guy . . respect.

Earlier today, two random thoughts on two very different people just entered my head from nowhere. They didn't knock, or phone first. Just popped-in through the window. Maybe they should have clip-clopped and whinnied. All I have done is introduce them to each other.

( A Reverie on a Lovely Girlie )

( Monday 2 February 2009 )</div>

Watchingthe birdies in elethe.livejournal.com/957611.html reminded me of an email I sent to a friend a few months ago. Here, verbatim, is the guts of the thing:




( Aggression gets you nowhere )</div>

It's been years since anyone asked me what my favourite painting was. Donks.

( Largish Picture below cut )

( Friday 30 January 2009 )</div>